
Board Members - Empowering or Exhausting?
–From Dr. Groff.
I attended an event where a successful entrepreneur spoke about the history and future directions of his company. The company was privately held. In his discourse, he mentioned the plan to create a board as part of succession planning. Then he said, “we’ve never had a board, and so we’re currently talking to people about how a board should run.” That statement made me leap from my chair and race up to him afterward in the way that I always do when I see someone hurtling themselves in front of a fast-moving train. I wasn’t concerned about the plans for a board; I was concerned because he’d built his company from some contrarian standpoints but was seeking typical board advice instead of constructing a board based on what he needed to match the DNA of his company. With a tiny bit of diplomacy, I said, “the success of your company is based in your non-traditional approach, and you want to follow traditional approaches now, instead of listening to your own judgment? You can build this the way you want, based on what you need, not on what everyone else is doing.”
If you already have a board and feel a little trapped, skip to the next section of this page. However, if you are in the process of building a board or choosing new members, work through the questions below so that you have a sense of the type of board and the individuals involved who will help create a win-win for your company.
Without clarity, everyone loses. Board members may feel that their time is being wasted. You may feel torn if the board’s recommendations contradict your vision of the path forward.
Whether you are looking to create a board or trying to work with the one you already have, the information and questions below are to help you maintain a board that empowers the growth of your organization.
Questions to Guide Board Member Selection
1. What is the overt, stated function of the board? What are the covert expectations?
An overt statement may be “to oversee the financial health and sustainability of an organization.” However, this statement does not specify the degree to which board members will be involved in decision-making. Hence, one board member may think his role is to vote on material financial decisions while another thinks her job is to micromanage the P & L.
2. What are the non-negotiable guiding values of the organization? Why specifically do you exist, and what are you trying to achieve? Most people think of values as moral compass foundations, such as integrity, but these are broad and difficult to operationalize. Explain why you exist and the rubric through which your decisions are filtered in just a few sentences. This clarity helps you assess whether potential board members can support that vision.
3. What do you want from board members?
- Fund-raising?
- Network Access and Introductions?
- Advice or Ideas?
Rank order what you want according to the factors that will have the most impact on your organizational goals.
4. How much involvement do you want from board members? Do you intend to have them speak into the operations of your company, as a resource when called upon, or simply as governance that meets corporation or investment requirements?
It sounds good to say that you welcome feedback, connections and advice. However, sometimes well-intended or ego-driven voices create extra noise. Think carefully on the front side about what you want and need from board members. Doing so will help you set appropriate expectations. These expectations go beyond any legal requirements associated with board member rights. For example, in some cases, board members may have the right to financial reporting; however, this does not mean they have the right to control decisions about operational expenditures. While the distinction is obvious on paper, the real-life manifestation often reflects an interplay of ego, peace-keeping, status, legal rights, and political machinations.
The Board is already established....and it's dysfunctional.
If you already have a set of board members but saw some questions above that resonate with you, you can still use them. Have a “reset” conversation that opens the door for changes that need to occur to increase alignment with the vision. This can be introduced in a non-threatening way. It may be something you put in as an annual process. One can frame it as a periodic review to ensure that the board is functioning well and that everyone’s time and resources are respected.
Two of the psychological tools that is vastly under-utilized is the impact of social desirability pressures and group conformity. While these phenomena often create harm, we can also use them to influence the behavior of board members.
A few quick notes on how to use social desirability and group conformity:
Social desirability means that we want people to think well of us. Most people have heard, “praise in public.” This tactic is reinforcing regardless of role or level because humans like to be seen and validated. By highlighting the behavior you want, you get more of it. At the risk of being offensive, training adults is the same as training children, cats and dogs. All of us behave, at least to some degree, according to what is rewarded or punished.
The rest of the sentence “criticize in public” is not necessarily true if one is trying to shape a group. Calling out bad behavior can send a clear message to the rest of the group on what is expected and tolerated. This strategy is nuanced and does require an elegant touch and clear knowledge of the players involved; however, it works regardless of who technically holds the most power.
Group Conformity is the social phenomenon that occurs when people defer or even go against their own judgment in group settings. The research on this is substantial and jarring as much of social psychology explains how the Holocaust was allowed to persist. At the same time, understanding group behavior provides tools that can be used for the good of everyone. For example, it only takes one voice of dissent to break a group consensus. When someone is willing to do this, others who have stayed silent will come forward. People often assume that silence is agreement, but it is not. Hence, if one or two people decide to start speaking or acting differently, they have the power to change the behavior of the entire group.
Difficult Board Members
Whether it’s the incessant talker, the person who challenges everything, or the one who wants to run YOUR organization, the common theme of difficult board members is distraction. Sometimes, the distraction is simply an annoyance; sometimes, it costs valuable time, energy, and organizational protection.
The struggles exist regardless of the organizational type. Whether you are a venture-backed, not-for-profit, or privately owned company, the humans involved will impact material decisions and outcomes.
Preferably, each organization has a screening system and a manner of setting expectations on the front end to prevent or limit difficult board members. However, that is an ideal scenario and not real-world for many organizations. Thus, you are not alone if you find yourself with a difficult board member. Get clear on the behavior that you want or don’t want. Get buy-in and support from other board members. Do not allow the difficult board member to rule the board, or you will gradually squeeze out the good members and attract more bad ones.
For more information on Difficult People, who can be Difficult Board members, refer specifically to the extended section on Difficult People in Dr. Groff’s Relational Genius book.

Dealing with a Difficult Board Member
Are you dealing with a difficult or toxic board member? It’s the person who expects his opinion and vast experience to outweigh everyone else’s voice. Or maybe the one who seems bent on creating drama and cannot be trusted to be straightforward in