How to Assess an Executive Coach: A Human Due Diligence Guide

Most leaders approach choosing an executive coach as a question of credentials. The more useful skill is knowing how to assess one. This is the same human due diligence I bring to evaluating any expert you let into your life or your business — screening for competence, fit, and genuine care before you commit real trust. Here’s how I’d do it.

When people work with an executive coach, the relationship fuels success. The more they feel supported and understood, the more information they will share — and that information is critical to strategy development and optimal results. You should feel that the coach cares. Can you grow from expertise without caring attached? Absolutely. However, when you are navigating rough waters, you want someone who has your back. It shouldn’t feel like you’re “a job” to the coach — you should feel from the beginning that there is a level of personal investment in your success.

In an initial conversation with a potential coach, pay attention to whether the coach “gets” you:

Does it feel easy to talk?

Do you have the feeling that the person is solid and trustworthy?

Do you feel matched intellectually?

Weight fit at least as heavily as credentials.

When people feel really comfortable with their coach, they are able to be open and vulnerable. Out of this openness and mutual collaboration comes a continuous, increasing return on investment that’s impossible to calculate. At any point in the process, someone should be able to ask “is your coach helpful?” and the answer should be an immediate, resounding “YES.” If the feeling is ambivalent, it means one of two things: the coach may be skilled but the wrong personality fit, or the personality fit is good, but the coach doesn’t have the skill set the leader finds invaluable.

A parallel worth considering: if you or a relative has ever seen a medical doctor, you know that the more comfortable you feel, the more you share. And the more information good doctors have, the better the diagnostic and treatment options they can offer.

Not necessarily. What matters is that the style matches what you need. I am fast, direct, intense, and all-in. That style is perfect for my clients but would be the wrong fit for someone who needs a slower or more Socratic approach.

Ask the coach directly: “Do you focus on providing information, tactics, and advice, or do you prefer to listen and ask questions that guide clients to their own solutions? Do I make the decisions about how we work, do you, or do we decide together?” This is a style-match question, not a right-or-wrong one. A coach who focuses on listening and Socratic questioning will frustrate someone who wants actionable advice. A person who wants a collaborative partnership will be turned off by a directive approach. When you listen to the answer, you should hear something that resonates with you.

The big ones: desperation, more talking than listening, pressure to decide, contracts.

If a coach seems desperate for business or wants you to rush a decision, keep looking. Desperation never yields a win-win — it means the coach isn’t in a position to make decisions that are in your or your organization’s best interest.

If the potential coach talks more than they listen, it is also a red flag.  The art of coaching comes from assessing and integrating all aspects of both the person and the system. If coaches are selling, they aren’t listening. When communication is a problem on the front end, the coaching outcome will be poor — and a poor result creates a secondary problem, where leaders either blame themselves or become less open to trying coaching at all in the future.

Contract traps. Coaches shouldn’t try to trap organizations with contracts, or vice versa. The relationship is built on mutual trust and competence. By the point people have to invoke contract clauses, the relationship is already broken. The better path is a clear conversation at the outset about how the relationship will end if the process isn’t a win-win.

Ask directly — approaches vary more than you’d expect.

Every coach has a slightly different perspective on confidentiality. Because of my personality and training as a psychologist, I’m a locked box; I usually won’t even mention a client or company’s name without express permission. Sometimes I’m involved in highly sensitive situations where it’s better that I stay invisible. However, I’ve seen some coaches and coaching organizations list the companies they’ve worked with as a symbol of credibility. Depending on your situation, that may or may not be a concern for you.

If confidentiality or anonymity matters to you, ask: “Can you tell me about other companies or clients you’ve worked with?” I personally hate this question, because I don’t want to divulge identifying details — but I also want to give enough to help a potential client decide. That tension is exactly why you should ask it. If you hear the coach’s concern for protecting current and past clients, you have a good starting signal that they will be careful with your information too.

Dr. Tricia Groff is an executive coach, psychologist, confidante, and strategic partner, and author of Relational Genius. She works with high-achieving executives on intersecting systems of personal, business, and emerging change. drtriciagroff.com